Chapter 148

Long time din't upload my picture...

here are some of my recent photos.

captured before I going to club.

Alex & Edward

this is totally failed man!! k5 VOMITT!!

DJ with me....

have a awesome night in Ipoh's club..!!

unforgettable night because of k5 vomiting !!

I have go through a Valentine's night with my girl..

what an awesome night ...

miss and love you so much!!

hope you will like my present !!

love you baby!

Chapter 147

Have a great time celebrating Chinese New Year in 2011.

A never had a chance to go back KL.

celebrating in Gopeng. ( my grandma house)

I only visit relatives in my mother side.

because of my father incident, so I din't go back to Seremban.

hopefully it was settle one day.

quite not bad.

had a great fun and joy with cousin from singapore.

feel like the situation was like a casino.

non stop gambling around.

texas poker, mah jong, black jack.

all kind of gambling.

but is true fun.

I lose about 1oo over this year.

hmm..since is not a good year for me in gambling.

but is okay, just for once a year.

too bad I've no car,

if not I will bring yan together with me.

and the bad thing is I don't know the way to 'mengelembu'..

never mind, hope I can make it next year.

this year angpow money is lesser compare last year.

maybe I only collect from relatives in mother side.

Chapter 146

There is no regret in my journey.

no burden no worries.

already 2 weeks in third sem.

socialization keep happening with me.

a non stop process since i ever born.

I want to have new friends,

new environment.

I don't want to stay in the sad memories that I had before.

Move forward to gain better.

I don't need a friend that ignore me always!

Today is the first time I release the sky lanterns.

it is amazing...

even the process is quick..

but it is meaningful...

according to chinese traditional culture,

we use to write our wishes on the sky lantern and release it into the sky so that God will receive your wishes and make it come true..

I have make 3 wishes....

not greedy la...some of them write the whole paper I saw..

Hope my wishes all comes true...

I saw a lot people doing the same thing like us....

it is really beautiful..and I would like to experience it once again...

Chapter 145

I don't want to make myself stress in a relationship!!!

why such girl like to make the guy to feel guilty?

Is is a human nature?

or purposely to make a fun..

this ain't funny!

I hate being like this.

I din't even did wrong in a situation,

At last I'm the one who said sorry,

please forgive me,

no more next time.

What the heck !!!

Harlo, !! a guy also need face okay.

not like a dog begging for forgiveness.

there is a limit in enduring.

A love should not be like this.

I just hope to had a mature girlfriend !!

Think of me,

care me,

love me,

accept me,

honest to me,

share everything with me,

enjoy with me,

is that so difficult??

I hope she will change for me.

Chapter 144

Recently seldom took photo.

cause don't really involve in outing.

I want to have a Happy chinese new year....

remove all the unwanted memories of me..

Delete them from me....

don't ever let them influence my mood..

I can live even better without them...

I don't want to be clown to somebody..

I want to be myself..

I got my right to choose my own way, especially my girlfriend...

don't show me such cocky face!!

I don't know why you all can behave differently when I get together with her.

did she hurt you in anyway?

Don't you all feel happy when I got my love?

I wont fucking care your feeling if you don't care mine...^^

today I heard a very meaningful philosophy from Mr.Bala ( my international studies lecture)

' The end decide the means '

as you achieve the satisfying goal, people will forget the way you behave..

Can I praise myself mature in managing a relationship?

this time is so different some other times.

hardly describe, but I can feel it really.

what is the most important in a relationship?

loyalty? confident? caring? sex?

don't call me choose either one...

because I need 4 of it...hahaha

Chapter 143

Myself!

A semester break that change me a lot.

my status change now.

don't have much direction.

Just want to did well on my study.

Din't go much place enjoy on semester break.

don't really have the mood for me.

did a silly thing during semester break.

I fill in diesel for my aunt car!!

lol, stupid right.

I din't realize about it.

I'm sorry...but I don't really want....hmmmm T.T

Family!

Hmm.. new semester..

everything seems to be okay right now.

Chinese New Year coming.

but does't seems to have the mood,

cause this time will celebrate in different way.

first time we celebrate CNY without daddy.

we'll having 团圆饭 in grandma house in Gopeng this time.

usually we eat at our home.

but this time....hmmm....

afraid....I afraid of my mom feeling right now.

I scare she can't face the relatives.

I hope she will get prepared for all this..

What she she need is us and time.

I love you mommy..

Friends!

recently I found out that I don't have really much friends, but I have true friends.

Love my brothers so much!!

when I need concern, you all are here and caring me...

when I need help, you willing to contribute your hand to me...

Thanks a lot.

how about the friends here.

last time we're happy together

but now...

maybe is my attitude problem, hardly to mix up with them anymore.

but is okay..depends on how they think me...

I was just like to fooling around, if they can't accept that..FINE...

I wont begging for such friends who not appreciate me at all....

always treat me as a 'clown'...

when you need joy you'll find me..fuck off man...

Love!

don't know what to write in love.

I love chee yan la...

hahaha..

sorry to my other 'fans' I'm unavailable..

I should be loyal to a girlfriend who loves me so much.

my brothers!!!

Chapter 142

I'm sorry my friend.

because of my personal problem make you all so worried.

I know you all purposely having a party to cheer me up,

thank you very much and I appreciate it.

Although I couldn't attend but I can feel your sincere.

sincerely apologize...friends forever.

I'm sorry my dear friend.

because of my personal problem , I have to cancel all the date with you.

In this time I'm not suitable to enjoy and hang out.

I need to spend more time with my family.

I'm sorry, sincerely apologize.

I'm sorry my lovely girlfriend.

I could not spend most of my time with you now.

I had to pay more attention on my family.

I'm sorry I love you.

By the time, I have such weird feeling on myself.

I feel like wanna escape from everyone.

I don't want to see anybody.

I want to hide myself.

In somehow, I had deactivate my facebook account....

I prefer myself in dream, so I can decorate my own life.

I don't know why such feeling will come on me.

I love my life, I enjoy my life.....

but now... I got the opposite feeling..

Maybe this is what we study in sociology

life course approach...

something happen that change your whole life.

no matter status or mind set.

this is interesting..but I dislike it much...